I lost a Facebook friend and I liked it!

I know last weekend I told you to think of some targets and I would help you hit them this week.  Something came up.  Sorry!  Next week I'll make the post go live.  But something happened yesterday that I just had to write about and I didn't want to bury my "hitting the target" post behind it.  What happened you ask? 

I apologize in advance that the post turned into a rant...  I needed to get some stuff off my chest obviously, haha.  Oh the therapy of Step Away from the Mall!  You guys rock!  Thanks for listening.

Anyhow, get ready:

I lost a Facebook friend... and I liked it! 

(You know that Katy Perry song, right?  Knowing how much of a dork I am you also probably know I had to "Swagbucks" the "main refrain" of her kissed a girl song to figure out who it was... yeah, sad, I know.  I used to be cool.  I swear!)

My point is that the title of this post must (yes, mandatory) be sung to the tune of that song.  That's how much stress losing this Fecebook friend saved me.  Sad, I know.  But I have a bunch of Facebook pet peeves - mostly relating to Facebook etiquette that I can't stand - and this one reduces a number of my pet peeves. 

I'm sure there are plenty of posts out there about Facebook "personalities."  I'm sure I have one.  But here are some I can't stand:

1. People who post pictures of them partying like it's going out of style (it might be) for the sole purpose of impressing people;
2. People who post about how tough their lives are;
3. Jack Handey.  Remember him?  These people post "deep thoughts" as their status;
4. The people who "like" the Jack Handey's deep thoughts;
5. The people who comment "wow - you should publish that stuff" to Jack Handey's deep thoughts; and
6. People who make a big fuss if you miss one of their status updates or don't comment about how cute their kid, how great their life is or how tough they have it.  You know those people, right?  Really needy people.

Wow... this post got angry.... OK.  Let's get back on track.  I got unfriended (or is it "defriended") yesterday.  Remember way back in the day when I begged you all to think twice about lending money to friends or family and I told you about "Cal"?  Well Cal friended me a while back.  That wasn't a big deal.  I love Cal.  But I don't love what Cal has done to himself and our extended family.  Because I'm more comfortable in my blogging skin these days I'll make a "big reveal" that Cal is a relatively distant cousin who is about 20 years older than me and has drained the wallets of more than one family member over the last 30 years... long story for another time. 

Cal was a Facebook personality #6 (he was also a #1 - partying like a rock star and letting everyone know about it).  Again, not a big deal or reason to celebrate losing him as a Facebook friend - just a bit frustrating.  But he was a really strong #6.  In fact, it was not unusual for me to get a call from my mom asking if I could "like" his status or comment on a picture because (get this) Cal whined to his mother that no one commented on his posts (or something like that).  Cal's mother then reached out to my grandmother, who told my mother who asked me to "like" or comment, etc.  Seriously.  This was one of the reasons I liked losing him as a Facebook friend.  Drama.

But what's relevant here is why he dropped me.  Remember reason number 2 of why I didn't give him money the last time he called?

I did not want to give a little and then get another call for a little more and a little more (I was still in my twenties at the time and did not want to have decades more (God willing) of these calls from Cal or anyone else).

Well, even though I didn't give him money last time he asked again.  This time it was in a Facebook message.  Same message pretty much.  This time asking for $1,500.

Again I said no.  Specifically, I wrote back and said something to the effect of:

I'm really sorry you're going through a rough time, but I'm not in a position to send you any money.  I hope and believe that things will work out for you and will pray that they do.

No response.  Just... GONE.  "Defriended" (or unfriended).  I wasn't sure what to make of it other than relieved.  His profile is relatively public so I can still see if he rebounds and will look (because I actually care).  But I won't have the personality #6 pressures anymore (hopefully no fielding "send me money" messages for a while).

To be clear, I've offered to "actually help" Cal by sending him "a few books that changed my life," but was told not to bother.  He doesn't want "actual" help.  He just wants money. 

I'm now sad.  My excitement was selfish.  I feel bad for Cal.  I want him to succeed.  But for the last 30 years no one has gotten through to him. 

Wow... this got "pretty real" right there at the end...

So what do you think?  What would you do? Would you try to help Cal?  How do you help someone like this?  Or do you let him hit bottom and hopefully figure it out?  From what I understand his parents and in-laws are "done" giving him money.  Call me crazy but that might be just what he needs to get his life in the right direction.

Have you lost a Facebook friend and liked it?  And what Facebook personality type are you?  :)

Until next time, put your credit card down and slowly step away from the mall!

Like what you see here? Tell your friends by sharing it with one of the buttons below. Post this to Facebook or Tweet it to help your friends and family, too. And don't forget to send me an e-mail or comment to say hello. I love hearing from you.

Also, please join our recently-started Facebook community where I hope to build a place where we can all share thoughts, successes and support.  And don't forget to follow me on twitter where you'll find most of the posts, random thoughts by me and more.  See you there!



Image: nuttakit / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Comparing the market for better credit card offers

I had another chance to check out a site that could be useful for our UK readers. This time it is comparethemarket.com, a site offering multiple credit card offers in the UK. 

As you undoubtedly know if you've been here more than once before, I use credit cards but don't carry a balance.  In fact, I'm a bit neurotic about paying off my balance even before the bill arrives.  I'm pretty sure there's a "condition" under there somewhere that could explain my obsession...

I'm also pretty careful not to spend more because I use credit cards instead of cash.  I auto-invest and auto-save.  And then I spend less than what's left over.  It might not be the most efficient way to do it, but it keeps me on track and is consistent with my personality.  When I get concerned about my financial security I stick my investments balance and auto-invest and auto-savings amounts into an investment calculator to remind myself that there's a method to my madness.  You'll always have moments where you momentarily question your stability.  Having a plan that confirms you're on track is a cure to those moments.

But that's just my personality.  I have a three-prong attack to keep my credit card use under control (auto-invest, auto-save and spending less than what's left over to control total spending).  So a cash back card fits my personality - no annual fee or rotating rewards (although I have a card with rotating rewards that I use if it happens to match up).

I frequently check around online to see if other cards come up that fit my credit card personality better - helping to keep me on track to reach my financial goals. 

Sites that compare multiple credit card offers in different categories can be useful to let you know what's out there to assist you with managing your credit card plan.  To be clear, "better credit card offers" are good "cherries on the sundae" or "frosting on the cake" to getting out of debt or using credit cards safer.  You still need to devise and work a plan to get ahead. 

The plan is the sundae, the cake.  You need to know your personality.   Checking credit card offer sites like compare the market can be very helpful in finding cards that better fit your credit card personality.  So if you can switch to a no-interest card, it can be helpful to save you a few bucks for example while you attack your debt.  But make sure you have a plan and attack it with great passion!

Until next time, put your credit card down and slowly step away from the mall!

This is a sponsored post written by me, Nick. But don't worry, I wasn't told what to write and haven't been censored! All thoughts are uninfluenced as always!



Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net

3 things you can learn from Apple

Two words:  Customer Service.

I don't spend a ton of money on many things (certainly not $18,000 on an iPod although I'm pretty sure my iPhone would be at least $1,000 by the same math).  But (long story short) a couple of years back my work was upgrading our then-blackberries and offered us a "stipend" towards an iPhone if we wanted, so I was able to score in iPhone and then rolled that into an iPhone 4 a little while back for very little added money, so I now sport a Siri-less iPhone 4 that I'm really happy with. 

I'm not really happy with the Apple earphones though.  The "cream of the crap" when it comes to earphones that sell for less than $50 in my opinion.  I'm on my third set since the beginning of 2011 including the set that came with the iPhone and two replacements that I bought in April 2011.  At $29 bucks a pop I'm in for $60 in Apple replacement headphones.

I'm pretty sure I lost the original ones.  I don't really remember.  But the two replacement ones I got in April started breaking down.  Basically, they work fine except the microphones don't work.  And because it's really cold in NYC, I'd rather keep my hands in my pocket when I'm talking.

So yesterday I got the urge to call Apple and ask if they were under warranty.  No luck apparently.  The woman on the phone was really nice and very helpful.  She put me on hold two times to make sure she was doing everything for me.  She said she couldn't find a warranty on headphones other than the 14-day return policy, but could offer me a refund on one of the sets, as I was on my second iPhone and they "appreciated" my business.  (Not sure how much of that is true, but she sounded sincere and that was important.).

So now I'm out $29 and have two sets of headphones with no working mic.  I decided to try my chances at a local Apple store on my way to the dentist.  I walk in and politely ask to speak with a genius.  Again, very nice.  I find my genius and explained what happened.  I showed them the e-mail confirmation that I bought the earphones on April 14, 2011, and asked if the earphones are under warranty.  The guy was very helpful, asked me my e-mail and what was wrong and then gave me a replacement set with a fresh warranty.  Score.  In less than 15 minutes I got a replacement set of earphones and my money back for the second pair.

Three key takeaways:

• I'm not happy because I got a replacement set and my money back on the other set.  I was really happy because they listened to me, acknowledged that my concern was valid and sincerely tried to address my concern.
• One of the customer service people was wrong, but it didn't matter because of the first bullet.  Specifically, one person told me there was a 14-day return policy and no warranty.  The other person said it was one year for earphones.  I don't really care who was right.  They both "did right by me."
• I was very polite and made no threats or demands.  In fact, I told both of them that I could appreciate that it's been a while since I got the earphones but would appreciate some help from them.  As a result, neither of them could reasonably believe they were trying to "save a relationship" with a customer.  Collectively, they addressed my concerns because they wanted to make a customer happy.

These "lessons" can be applied in business, as an "employee" or as a spouse, mother, father, etc.  Especially when some one's upset with you, the best thing you can do is listen and acknowledge them.  Even if you believe they are being unreasonable, they don't think they are.  Want to solve a problem?  Truly acknowledge the person who is upset.  You'll likely get them on your side.

Anyone can be wrong, but it's not about right or wrong.  The important part of any customer service (or familial or employment) relationship is identifying and addressing the problem in the mind of the other person.  And remember, the voice on the other line is that of a person - a mother, father, son or daughter.  Treat them like you would treat your mother, father, son or daughter.  Cool?

Don't worry about "saving relationships."  While you can't teach "wanting to make a customer happy," you can train others or understand yourself that all customers want to leave happier than when they came in.  Don't you like to make people smile?  Show it.

In the end, I was psyched and will remain a relatively-loyal Apple customer.  Oh, and the phone and store visit took less than 15 minutes total.  Score.

Anyone else have a great customer service experience with Apple or anyone else?  Anything that surprised you?  Of course I also have my horror stories, but Apple really exceeded my expectations and I didn't want it to go unnoticed.  Maybe that's why Apple went nuts this last quarter in sales and profits.
Until next time, put your credit card down and slowly step away from the mall!

Like what you see here? Tell your friends by sharing it with one of the buttons below. Post this to Facebook or Tweet it to help your friends and family, too. And don't forget to send me an e-mail or comment to say hello. I love hearing from you.

Also, please join our recently-started Facebook community where I hope to build a place where we can all share thoughts, successes and support.  And don't forget to follow me on twitter where you'll find most of the posts, random thoughts by me and more.  See you there!

Used Car Prices, George Costanza, Jon Voight, Dane Cook and You!

As a child of the 80s and 90s (and still a kid at heart) I was and am a pretty big Seinfeld fan.  One of my favorite episodes involved George Costanza buying what he thought was actor Jon Voight's used car.  It turns out it was "just a regular" Jon Voight's car (I think a dentist who actually spelled his name J-O-H-N) and George's car was worth only the Kelly Blue Book value.  Poor George.  Can't catch a break.

Well it turns out George Costanza was before his time.  While it is no Jon Voight (sorry Dane), if you're in the market for a gently used 2003 Lexus SC 430 and have an extra 20 grand handy you could score what is apparently a fully-loaded 9-year old "fancy pants" car formerly owned by "famous comedian" Dane Cook!  By the way, does the phrase "gently used" creep anyone else out or am I just a weirdo?  It makes me feel a bit dirty...

It gets better!  While I don't remember if George paid any "Jon Voight premium" over the KBB value of that car, apparently being formerly owned by "famous comedian" Dane Cook actually reduces the value of a car, as the asking price of this one is $130 less than the KBB suggested price in "fair" condition and $2,630 less than an "excellent" condition one.  As the listing appears to claim "excellent" is the proper condition (It describes the car as "beautiful" and "simply great.") it looks like a bargain.

Poor Dane Cook!  :) Just kidding of course - I'm sure he'll be OK...  But it certainly begs the question of whether you would buy a car simply because a "famous celebrity" used to own it (and whether Dane Cook is actually a celebrity...).  It would certainly make for a fun story to tell, I guess (the first time at least) especially if it's a really cool celebrity. 

I'm pretty sure I wouldn't "pay up" for a Dane Cook car even though he told a funny joke once or twice.  Maybe it would be a tie breaker just for the story - for an extra buck or two.  I don't think I'd pay up more than $5. 

Then again, as of this writing he has approximately 2,690,306 more twitter followers than I do.  That's a lot of twitter followers... Maybe he is a celebrity...

What about you?  How much more would you pay for Dane Cook's old car?  Assume for this question he used to drive the exact make and model you want.  The only difference is Dane Cook drove it.  Would you give the seller an extra $20?  Is there any celebrity you would pay up for?

And am I the only one who didn't realize Dane Cook was so popular?  Over 2.5 million twitter followers is pretty impressive.  I had a lot of fun at Dane's expense until I checked out his twitter feed - even if the official "Dane Cook News Feed" contains no entries...at least as of this post.  Now I feel a little bad for picking on him...

Finally, does this discussion say anything about our priorities?  If they were asking for $5,000 more because it belonged to a "famous celebrity" it would annoy the "living daylights" out of me.  I guess I have to give props to the seller for keeping the price where it belongs (or below) for what you're getting.  So the fact that the car is still for sale makes me feel a little better.
Until next time, put your credit card down and slowly step away from the mall!

Like what you see here? Tell your friends by sharing it with one of the buttons below. Post this to Facebook or Tweet it to help your friends and family, too. And don't forget to send me an e-mail or comment to say hello. I love hearing from you.

Also, please join our recently-started Facebook community where I hope to build a place where we can all share thoughts, successes and support.  And don't forget to follow me on twitter where you'll find most of the posts, random thoughts by me and more.  See you there!

When "never retiring" is the best decision for you

A month ago, I got pretty upset when I read that one in six Americans believes they will never be able to retire.  That makes me crazy - which is why so many posts since then discuss how simple it can be to make it happen - slowly but surely, of course. 

So when I saw this article yesterday over at USA Today, I couldn't resist talking about it for a minute.  This is another article about "never retiring."  But this one is different.  This one is about a bunch of people like Frank Pascarelli, who is patiently awaiting his 80th birthday party next month.  And he's still working.  He's selling cars - and apparently a bunch of them!

Pascarelli led sales at Linus Cadillac Buick GMC in Vero Beach, Fla., "for well over a decade, and still does better than the majority of the salespeople," says Vincent Perez, general manager. "His work is exemplary. I'm very proud to have him."

Go Mr. P!  More importantly:

Pascarelli has not stopped working, not because he can't afford to stop or because he saw investments go sour. He'll be 80 next month and is financially set, he says. He just enjoys working.

And apparently the trend is not limited to Mr. Pascarelli:

An April Gallup survey had similar findings: 534 working people were asked whether, when they reached retirement age, "you think you will continue working and work full-time; continue working and work part-time; or stop working altogether?" Those who answered that they would continue to work were then asked, "Would you do it because you want to, or because you will have to?"

• 18% said they would work full-time, and a third of those said it was because they wanted to, not because they would have to. 

• 63% said they would work part-time; almost two-thirds of those said they would do it because they wanted to. 

• 18% said they would retire and stop working altogether.

So if my math is right (it's probably not but it's within a percent or two I'm sure...) almost 48% of the people surveyed would continue to work full or part time because they wanted to - not because they're broke.

This is why you should start saving for retirement now.  This is why you should slowly but surely become a millionaire.  Not so you have money.  So you have choices.  Work if you want to work.  Don't work if you don't (or can't).

So let's raise our glasses to Mr. P and everyone one of us who remembers today (wait...I'm the only one drinking? Ha!  Don't worry.  It's just free work coffee...).  If you're well on your way to being able to retire at the "typical retirement age," that's great.  Today is validation.

If you're not then start today!  Call and ask what the minimum investment in your company's 401(k) or 403(b) is.  Set up a Roth IRA.  Start today so some day you stop working when you want to.

By the way, the pic is actually of Mr. Pascarelli, taking a phone call in his office at his car dealership in Vero Beach, Fla.  Pretty cool

Until next time, put your credit card down and slowly step away from the mall!

Like what you see here? Tell your friends by sharing it with one of the buttons below. Post this to Facebook or Tweet it to help your friends and family, too. And don't forget to send me an e-mail or comment to say hello. I love hearing from you.

Also, please join our recently-started Facebook community where I hope to build a place where we can all share thoughts, successes and support.  And don't forget to follow me on twitter where you'll find most of the posts, random thoughts by me and more.  See you there!